It sure does seem like everyone is on edge these days. All of us. No one is exempt. I cannot remember a time when so many people felt so much pressure. Our communities are experiencing distress and it feels like the stakes are high. While we cannot immediately change the current situation or conditions we are living through, we can learn to tolerate the uncertainty and frustration and make good decisions from a place of peace and calm.
When we are under tremendous stress and cannot regulate our emotions, we cannot make sound decisions. During high stress, our brains reroute all the resources (blood, energy, etc) away from the thinking part of our brain ( neocortex) and feeling part (limbic) and into the survival part of the brain (reptilian). We physically do not have the resources to access the parts of our brains to make sound choices. It is not a weakness or character flaw, its biology. Lucky for us there is a tool we can use to interrupt this process and calm our bodies down so we can access the parts of our brains that can think at higher levels. TIPP is a coping strategy that we can use to take us out of our fight/flight/freeze mode. (learn more about that via my favorite video here https://youtu.be/rpolpKTWrp4) TIPP stands for Temperature, Intense Exercise, Paced Breathing, and Progressive Muscle Relaxation. When we move through these coping skills, we begin to feel a sense of self-control return.
Temperature- When we’re upset, our bodies often feel hot. Mammals (which we are) have a “dive reflex”, which is activated when we put cold water on our faces or submerge ourselves in cold water. The reflex tells our body to slow our heart to below its resting heart rate. It does so by activating our parasympathetic nervous system, which regulates our functions. To activate this response, splash your face with cold water, hold an ice cube, or let the AC blow on your face. Changing your body temperature will help you cool down—both physically and emotionally.
Intense Exercise - When we feel intense emotions, we also feel driven to act or say something. Sometimes our urges tell us to “do” something negative. Intense exercise helps soothe the body’s urge to “Do something now!” It also has mood-boosting benefits, both during and after the physical activity. After exercise, our parasympathetic nervous system is activated again, naturally bringing our heart rate and respirations to a more manageable level.
Do intense exercise to match your intense emotion. Sprint down to the end of the street, jump in the pool for a few laps, hop on a stationary bike, run up and down some stairs, drop and do push-ups until you’ve tired yourself out. Increasing oxygen flow helps decrease stress levels. Plus, it’s hard to stay edgy when you’re wiped out.
Progressive Muscle Relaxation - Refocusing your mind on tensing and releasing various muscle groups throughout the body provides an excellent distraction from your racing thoughts. The goal here is awareness of body tension. The science of paired muscle relaxation is fascinating. When you tighten a voluntary muscle, relax it, and allow it to rest, the muscle will become more relaxed than it was before it was tightened. Relaxed muscles require less oxygen, so your breathing and heart rate will slow down. Allow yourself fifteen minutes for this exercise. Begin with your forehead and cheek muscle–practice tensing these, holding that tension, and then releasing them. Notice how your body feels before, during, and after this practice. Continue this with various other muscle groups throughout the body—neck, shoulders, chest, arms, hands, abdomen, legs, etc. Let the muscles relax, and you’ll begin to relax as well.
As with all self-soothing and self-regulation tips, it is best to practice these skills when you are calm so that you are well versed in the usage when you are in distress. The more you practice when you do not need the skills, the stronger your skills will be when you do need them. It is like building any skillset. When you have outsmarted your brain and released your thoughts from fight or flight mode, you can tolerate strong emotions until you are able to resolve them. We have the ability to work through tough situations. We have before, we can now. We are all stronger than we know.
There are some things you learn best in calm, and some in the storm.
– Willia Cather
*Alexa Griffith, LMHC, LCAC, NCC, RPT is a licensed mental health therapist. Alexa enjoys providing individual counseling and family counseling. She also provides play therapy for children, as well as teen and adolescent counseling via telehealth or in office.
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